Life can make you numb.  

Allowing the nothingness to place a veil over all of your happy memories and drop you in this state, so, even if you pinch yourself really hard you are in two minds if you were ever real in the first place. 

You could be in this place now, perhaps you know you have been there or are looking for a way out. 

Personally, I have found, there is this one moment in your life that makes you realise you are worth saving. It can also be little moments that build into one fuzzy delight. It can be called an Aha, or Awakening or a Life Changing moment. It depends on how hard it hits you, and if it is enough of a jolt to send you veering off this painful existence and onto the yellow brick road you never knew was there. 

This moment can feel painful, knowing or exciting. You could have lost someone or found something. Been reminded or remember. There are no rules.  

I realised, over time, it does happen to me. I’m not and wasn’t the only one lost and alone, wondering if I had been forgotten by the writers of life. Patience is indeed a virtue, together with trust and faith.  

It is both messy and glorious. 


I would often get flashbacks, some not ones I really wanted to have repeated in my mind. It was the ones that brought a smile to my face that got me intrigued. It was like my mind was playing peek-a-boo with my memories.  

It was these trickling moments that set me on a trail of exploration, I began to have urges to get outside – free was calling me. 

I found myself on a treasure hunt, without any clues or compass to guide me – only my senses could re-discover those hidden treasures awaiting me. 

I can hear the birds for the first time in forever and Oh tomatoes! How I have missed your earthy deliciousness. Even washing up is bliss, play with the bubbles and watch the world go by from the window and muse at your wonderings of people.

This is living. Where have you been? Never mind you have come back, all is well.

The battle that once stormed in my mind became a quiet place that began to talk to my heart - a mind, once full,  was now a creative dance with magic.

Sam Geddes

Sam Geddes is a writer, storyteller and teacher you will find her wandering the wilderness in Wiltshire, UK, often with her four children in tow and seeking out the magic in everyday. Founding Editor of Catching Life Magazine, she has a passion for mindful misfits finding their way in the world and creating a world that works with Mother Nature and not against her.

Sam shares her own journey through healing and all the messy and glorious wisdom that comes from it over at samanthageddes.com